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rsadelleContent notes: spoilers, discussion of a consent issue
I tweeted about Bridgerton when I watched it, but actually I can't stop thinking about how much the most annoying piece of the story annoyed me. So the basic plot is that Simon doesn't want to get married and Daphne needs to attract suitors. By pretending to court, she gets a lot of attention and no one tries to marry him off. The first five episodes of the show are an excellent fake dating and then they have to get married story, culminating in their wedding night love confessions and sex scene. I was impressed that they ran the love confession and sex scene as a single scene without breaking it up with bits of other plotlines.
The annoying thing about the story is the why Simon doesn't want to get married and have children part. I am (obviously) all for people not being partnered or having children if they don't want to. Simon's dad was a terrible father, and someone at one point says that he wanted an heir where Simon's mother, who died in childbirth, wanted a child. When Simon's father was on his deathbed, Simon made a vow to him that he would never get married and have an heir and that their line would die with him. So it's not that Simon doesn't want to have children or worries that he would continue the cycle of abuse or anything sensible; he just doesn't want to have children out of spite for a guy who is now dead - or at least that's all that's in the text of the show. I hated this as a motivation, and the way the story then continues to play out is terrible in part because of it. Simon figuring out how to deal with his childhood trauma or actually thinking about having children with Daphne and deciding he wants that would have been so much more interesting as a story than what actually happens!
I think this disconnect is part of why I felt a little like I was slogging through the last three eps. (The other part is because I didn't care much about their relationship once we got to the love confession bit.) In case you haven't read the spoilers, what happens is that Simon and Daphne have a lot of sex and he always pulls out so she won't get pregnant. She, of course, knows nothing about sex and doesn't realize that this is his birth control method. Once she finds out, she has sex with him, gets on top, and doesn't let him pull out. Apparently it's even more clearly a rape scene in the book than it is in the show - I found it felt less like rape and more like it's a soap opera where everyone behaves badly. (I fully understand that this is also a problem). Two other interesting bits about it, aside from the racism angle that's been well covered: 1. I saw a tweet long before I knew anything about this pointing out that for many romance readers, dubious consent is a feature not a bug, and was confused as the show went on about where the dubcon was because Daphne kept fully consenting. I was very surprised that the person whose consent is in question was a man. 2. Once I got fed up of waiting for it to happen and googled for spoilers around the consent issue people were talking about, one of the primary articles that came up seemed somewhat concerned about the scene itself and even more concerned about the possibility that it would make people outside the romance community think romance novels are full of rape. It seemed like an odd balance of concerns.
Anyway, in their fight about it afterwards, Simon says he thought Daphne knew what was going on, which makes no sense within the context of the story. While they're fake dating, she asks him, since they're friends and she can ask inappropriate questions, what happens in the marriage bed, and he tells her it's an extension of what you do alone at night. She has no idea what he's talking about, and he basically explains masturbation to her. (I was impressed that they then showed her masturbating.) He knows she has no sexual education; why would he think anyone actually talked to her about it before she got married and now she knows how babies are made?
I find it interesting that this whole Simon doesn't want kids out of spite instead of dealing with his issues is the thing I keep thinking about as the most annoying part of the show after I watched it. While I was watching it, I was as annoyed, if not more annoyed, that none of the Bridgerton siblings was explicitly queer. It's a Shondaland soap opera! They always have queer main characters. The only queer character is a very small bit part side character who basically says, "Oh, you're an artist? Here is my card. Come visit my studio," to the artist brother but somehow turns out to not be hitting on him, which is the exact opposite of what I've been led to believe about that sort of thing by the queer historical romances I've been reading recently.
I tweeted about Bridgerton when I watched it, but actually I can't stop thinking about how much the most annoying piece of the story annoyed me. So the basic plot is that Simon doesn't want to get married and Daphne needs to attract suitors. By pretending to court, she gets a lot of attention and no one tries to marry him off. The first five episodes of the show are an excellent fake dating and then they have to get married story, culminating in their wedding night love confessions and sex scene. I was impressed that they ran the love confession and sex scene as a single scene without breaking it up with bits of other plotlines.
The annoying thing about the story is the why Simon doesn't want to get married and have children part. I am (obviously) all for people not being partnered or having children if they don't want to. Simon's dad was a terrible father, and someone at one point says that he wanted an heir where Simon's mother, who died in childbirth, wanted a child. When Simon's father was on his deathbed, Simon made a vow to him that he would never get married and have an heir and that their line would die with him. So it's not that Simon doesn't want to have children or worries that he would continue the cycle of abuse or anything sensible; he just doesn't want to have children out of spite for a guy who is now dead - or at least that's all that's in the text of the show. I hated this as a motivation, and the way the story then continues to play out is terrible in part because of it. Simon figuring out how to deal with his childhood trauma or actually thinking about having children with Daphne and deciding he wants that would have been so much more interesting as a story than what actually happens!
I think this disconnect is part of why I felt a little like I was slogging through the last three eps. (The other part is because I didn't care much about their relationship once we got to the love confession bit.) In case you haven't read the spoilers, what happens is that Simon and Daphne have a lot of sex and he always pulls out so she won't get pregnant. She, of course, knows nothing about sex and doesn't realize that this is his birth control method. Once she finds out, she has sex with him, gets on top, and doesn't let him pull out. Apparently it's even more clearly a rape scene in the book than it is in the show - I found it felt less like rape and more like it's a soap opera where everyone behaves badly. (I fully understand that this is also a problem). Two other interesting bits about it, aside from the racism angle that's been well covered: 1. I saw a tweet long before I knew anything about this pointing out that for many romance readers, dubious consent is a feature not a bug, and was confused as the show went on about where the dubcon was because Daphne kept fully consenting. I was very surprised that the person whose consent is in question was a man. 2. Once I got fed up of waiting for it to happen and googled for spoilers around the consent issue people were talking about, one of the primary articles that came up seemed somewhat concerned about the scene itself and even more concerned about the possibility that it would make people outside the romance community think romance novels are full of rape. It seemed like an odd balance of concerns.
Anyway, in their fight about it afterwards, Simon says he thought Daphne knew what was going on, which makes no sense within the context of the story. While they're fake dating, she asks him, since they're friends and she can ask inappropriate questions, what happens in the marriage bed, and he tells her it's an extension of what you do alone at night. She has no idea what he's talking about, and he basically explains masturbation to her. (I was impressed that they then showed her masturbating.) He knows she has no sexual education; why would he think anyone actually talked to her about it before she got married and now she knows how babies are made?
I find it interesting that this whole Simon doesn't want kids out of spite instead of dealing with his issues is the thing I keep thinking about as the most annoying part of the show after I watched it. While I was watching it, I was as annoyed, if not more annoyed, that none of the Bridgerton siblings was explicitly queer. It's a Shondaland soap opera! They always have queer main characters. The only queer character is a very small bit part side character who basically says, "Oh, you're an artist? Here is my card. Come visit my studio," to the artist brother but somehow turns out to not be hitting on him, which is the exact opposite of what I've been led to believe about that sort of thing by the queer historical romances I've been reading recently.