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schuyler linked to this post (for anyone reading this in a future where it's gone, it's Pete Wentz's blog post with this picture of Gabe and Bronx) and said, "Someone needs to tell Pete that Gabe will steal his baby. Bitch has a loudass biological clock." To which I said, "OMG, do I want fic about Gabe plotting how he's going to run away with Bronx and teach him the way of the Cobra." And then I wrote this instead. Wacky hijinks are not my forte. This was also written via Twitter in 140-character bursts (See what you miss by not following me?), and is ridiculously self-indulgent.
"Look, kid, don't listen to your parents. The Cobra will teach you all you need know. Just trust your Uncle Gabe." He edges toward the door.
Bill calls later and says, "Why can't you just have a kid of your own?" and Gabe says, "Can I have it with you?" and, "Who told you?"
"Ashlee has me on speed dial. You're tall and I have narrow hips. I'd never survive childbirth."
"I'd give birth for you," Gabe tells him.
"And what are we going to do with the kid while we're on tour?" Bill is infuriatingly rational about this.
"Take it with us."
"Not with Panic," Bill says firmly. "I'm sure Urie and his cameraman are just waiting for the chance to add a baby to their household. And what about when we're on different tours?"
"No overlapping tours," Gabe says firmly. "Our family stays together."
Bill remains unmoved.
A week later, Gabe maneuvers himself to be the only adult around when Pete absolutely has to be somewhere else right now.
By the time Ashlee finds them, Gabe has Bronx in a purple hoodie, an awesome yellow hat, green shades, and a teething-safe Cobra necklace.
This time, Bill shows up on Gabe's bus. "I'm sure someone on this tour would cuddle with you if you asked. You didn't have to take Bronx."
Gabe sits down half in Bill's lap and rests his head on Bill's shoulder. "They would never let me dress them."
Bill exhales heavily. "I never let you dress me."
Gabe smashes his face into Bill's neck. "You'd have to let me dress up our kid."
Gabe's half asleep by the time Bill says, "Next time, you could just say you miss me," into his hair.
schuyler linked to this post (for anyone reading this in a future where it's gone, it's Pete Wentz's blog post with this picture of Gabe and Bronx) and said, "Someone needs to tell Pete that Gabe will steal his baby. Bitch has a loudass biological clock." To which I said, "OMG, do I want fic about Gabe plotting how he's going to run away with Bronx and teach him the way of the Cobra." And then I wrote this instead. Wacky hijinks are not my forte. This was also written via Twitter in 140-character bursts (See what you miss by not following me?), and is ridiculously self-indulgent."Look, kid, don't listen to your parents. The Cobra will teach you all you need know. Just trust your Uncle Gabe." He edges toward the door.
Bill calls later and says, "Why can't you just have a kid of your own?" and Gabe says, "Can I have it with you?" and, "Who told you?"
"Ashlee has me on speed dial. You're tall and I have narrow hips. I'd never survive childbirth."
"I'd give birth for you," Gabe tells him.
"And what are we going to do with the kid while we're on tour?" Bill is infuriatingly rational about this.
"Take it with us."
"Not with Panic," Bill says firmly. "I'm sure Urie and his cameraman are just waiting for the chance to add a baby to their household. And what about when we're on different tours?"
"No overlapping tours," Gabe says firmly. "Our family stays together."
Bill remains unmoved.
A week later, Gabe maneuvers himself to be the only adult around when Pete absolutely has to be somewhere else right now.
By the time Ashlee finds them, Gabe has Bronx in a purple hoodie, an awesome yellow hat, green shades, and a teething-safe Cobra necklace.
This time, Bill shows up on Gabe's bus. "I'm sure someone on this tour would cuddle with you if you asked. You didn't have to take Bronx."
Gabe sits down half in Bill's lap and rests his head on Bill's shoulder. "They would never let me dress them."
Bill exhales heavily. "I never let you dress me."
Gabe smashes his face into Bill's neck. "You'd have to let me dress up our kid."
Gabe's half asleep by the time Bill says, "Next time, you could just say you miss me," into his hair.