Hockey Wives: Season 1, Episode 7
May. 6th, 2015 08:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rsadelleThis episode was a little more freeform than the last one. We saw a few women together, but for the most part, this episode was focused on women and their partners as Christmas approaches. My favorite reviewers from The National Post were entertaining again this week, although I didn't directly connect any of their points to the rest of this entry. I'm will warn you up front that most of this entry is about Brandon Prust and Maripier Morin, and I didn't think much of either of them or their relationship skills.
Brijet and Tiffany
Brijet Whitney and Tiffany Parros spend their time together in this episode. Ray has announced his retirement, and he and George are playing together in an NHL alumni game in Utah, which gives Tiffany and Brijet time to hang out together. They talk a little bit about retirement. Brijet says, "The day that Ray announced, I was glad that I talked to you early, because later on, I kind of fell apart." Tiffany is, for once, not overbearing about the emotional state of someone else. She asks, "You did? Why?" in a tone that makes it clear that she doesn't understand, but she doesn't push back when Brijet talks about her feelings more. We do get her now familiar to the camera comment about how Ray and Brijet don't have to work if they don't want to, unlike George and Tiffany, but for the most part, Tiffany came off as much more gracious and happy in this episode.
During the hockey game, Tiffany says to George, "If you get a hat trick," and gestures at herself and Brijet. To the camera she says, "I mean, obviously we promised him a threesome. But it's like butt sex. You never actually get it. You just promise it." Personally, I rolled my eyes over this, but I bring it up because Maripier tweeted about it: "OMG!! @tparros you did not just say that on national television!! #buttsex" Remember that astonishment at Tiffany's subject choice; it's going to become relevant later.
Martine
Before leaving LA after the party in the last episode, Martine Forget goes to lunch with Jenny Scrivens, Lauren Colella (Jordan Nolan's fiancée), Lauren King, Kelly Williams, and a woman named Veronica Pinto, who the show captions as "Martine's friend." There are really only two interesting things here. First, Veronica does not look like the other women. She isn't as skinny, and she has a round face. I found it interesting that she was the one who was there specifically because she's friends with the model. The other interesting thing is that Martine says she and Jonathan have been engaged for four years. She says there's a lot of pressure to get married, but they just keep pushing the wedding off. "I want to get married, he wants to get married, but if you're in love, like, you don't need to get married because of people, like, talking about it."
Back in Toronto, Martine tells us that she and Jonathan aren't talking much right now because Jonathan gets mad when he loses. Yikes. Then she takes Tyler for a photo shoot for their Christmas cards - without Jonathan because he's so sad. This is not exciting, although it was interesting that Mandi Salmond, Cody Franson's girlfriend, went with her. Martine says about Tyler, "He just, like, knew what he was doing. Maybe he wants to be a model like Mommy."
Noureen
Noureen DeWulf is now in Vancouver. Most of her time in this episode is spent on a photo shoot for with Ryan for Hello! Canada. The best part of this is a bit I can't accurately render in text. Noureen makes two different model faces to indicate her modeling style versus Ryan's modeling style. It's hilarious, but really needs to be seen to get the full effect.
Kodette
Kodette LaBarbera has a meeting with the group from Ryder's therapy team to discuss his progress. This is a meeting with a group of ten women, who are all involved in his program in some way. I thought the phrasing the women used was interesting - these are people who have a lot of training in how to talk to clients about these kinds of things - and I was fascinated by just how many people were involved. We didn't get any kind of introduction to the women, so I'm not sure exactly what role each of them plays in Ryder's therapy.
We next see Kodette bundling the kids into the car to go pick Jason up at the airport. It's Christmas, and he gets to come home for a few days. Easton is very excited to see Jason; Ryder refuses to hug him. "I want to hug you," he tells Kodette.
The family goes skating, which is adorable. Easton is okay, Ryder has never been on skates before. Kodette says, "I guess I'm a little like Easton. I think I'm pretty good out there. But I know that Jason is a little worried about me on skates and thinks I'm going to hurt myself." This is all kinds of adorable, because there are tiny children on skates and because Kodette and Jason both laugh about Kodette's iffy skating abilities. They also have a conversation about how they're getting older. Jason says, "I don't feel thirty-five. I don't feel like the oldest guy on the team." Kodette says, with a laugh, "When did that happen? When did we become the old ones?" No wonder I like Kodette; we're about the same age.
At home, Kodette and Jason talk about Ryder's progress report. Kodette tells Jason that Ryder's therapy team thinks he can attend a typical school next year. "With an aid, though, right?" Jason asks, and Kodette says, "Yeah, and then he can, like, transition fine." Basically, this means they can move to live with Jason next season. Kodette tells the camera, "I can't help but be like, you know, we made the right decision to live apart this year. With Ryder doing so well, it's definitely worth it." The thing I've most liked about Jason and Kodette's relationship on this show is that they were a team in making this decision to live apart, and I like that it feels like they're a team in making the decision to all live together wherever Jason is next year.
Maripier
We spend Christmas with Brandon and Maripier. They drive, with Brandon's sister and nephew, to Quebec City, where both families are spending Christmas together. Maripier really emphasizes that she's excited to have their families together. We only meet Brandon's parents, his sister and her husband and children, and Maripier's parents. According to this interview, Maripier has two brothers. I think they're there in at least the scene of everyone at dinner, but we never meet them, so I wonder if they declined to be featured.
Brandon and Maripier arrive in Quebec City only to face a great crisis: they have no booze, and stores are closing in twenty minutes. They rush out to buy booze and, of course, get stopped by people who recognize Brandon. About the last person, Maripier says, "She tells me in French, 'I don't know who he is. I think my son likes him.' But then she says that she watches my show, so now I like her. So I feel like people are looking at us, and not just at him." This is another example of how she seems to want attention that she doesn't get when Brandon's around. They also buy a lot of booze. I'm a terrible judge of drinking cultures because I don't drink, so I would like to hear other people's thoughts about Maripier and alcohol on this show. From my perspective, she spends an awful lot of the time she's on screen drinking, getting a drink, or talking about getting drunk. I'm not sure if that's part of the lifestyle the show is trying to portray, if she really does drink a lot, or if it doesn't look like a lot to people who drink.
The whole group goes skating. Maripier says of the rink, "Nothing in my memories is more beautiful than this scenery over Christmas." Then she talks about skating: "I left my parents' place when I was twelve years old because I was a figure skater, so to go train, I had to leave and go to Rimouski. I was living in a villa, going to school in the morning, and then training during the afternoon. My goal was to go to the Olympics. And when I was seventeen, I injured my back. I always defined myself as a figure skater, so when I hurt my back, I didn't know what I was good at, but what I realize now is that everything I learned from figure skating, it built who I am." This to me really explains Maripier. I know people can learn social skills at boarding schools, but my guess is that the experience of moving away and into some sort of figure skating program where they may or may not have attended to her social development is why she, as she puts it, has no filter, and probably also why she has no idea what a healthy relationship looks like.
This skating adventure should just be sheer adorableness as they skate around with Chase and Sonia, Brandon's nephew and neice who are old enough to skate, but then Maripier starts talking about how great a dad Brandon will be and says, "My heart just melts when I see Brandon with Sonia and Chase. It makes me realize how amazing of a dad he's gonna be. I think that's when I love him the most, when he's with the kids. I definitely see myself with our kids, skating. I can't wait actually." This is the point where I had to pause the show and go yell on Twitter because just yelling, "Do not have kids with this man!" at the screen wasn't enough. In the comments on last week's post,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
jazzish linked to this recent picture Maripier tweeted. Much of their skating adventure, including the parts where Brandon and Maripier hold hands while skating, and especially the gift giving part that comes next, feels like that picture: Maripier is being very physically affectionate and loving to Brandon, and he's doing the bare minimum of not pushing her away and sometimes giving her a kiss.
Back in their room/suite/whatever, Brandon asks if Maripier wants her Christmas present now. She gets a drink first, then cuddles up into the tiny space between him and the arm of the couch. He has to get up to get her gift, and he sits down at the opposite end of the couch after he hands her the bag. Inside the bag is a jewelry box - "Brandon gives me a little box, and I have no clue what's in that little box, but a girl can tell pretty quickly when it's not a ring box, and he's not on his knees," Maripier tells the camera - which holds a bracelet Maripier saw over the summer and loved. She didn't tell Brandon about it, so she's amazed he got it for her. This part, where she's amazed and he looks so pleased with getting it right is adorable. Then Maripier puts it on, discovers it's a watch, and starts to cry. She tells the camera, "Fuck, it's a watch. I'm crying because our relationship could be over. When you give a watch to someone, you're putting a time on your relationship," but when Brandon says, "Cry over everything," she tells him, with a clearly upset look on her face, "Happy tears." This is the point at which I lost all hope for Maripier. She's blatantly lying to her partner about her feelings, she's measuring their relationship based on some sort of weird divination of the meaning of gifts that sounds like it comes from the worst kind of women's magazine, and she seems completely sincere about doing both of these things. There isn't even a hint here that maybe some part of her knows there's something wrong with this. Instead of then having a conversation with Brandon about her feelings and what she wants or needs to feel secure in this relationship, she needles him about not proposing to her. She tells him, "It crossed my mind, though. I was like, maybe he's gonna do it, by having both families together." His answer is, "I'm sure it crossed a lot of people's minds," with a look on his face that says he was definitely not one of those people. Maripier then asks him, "Why don't you want to marry me?" He says, with a laugh, as if that's supposed to make it an acceptable way to talk to your partner, "Shut up. I do. I'm just waiting for you to pass all your tests." Maripier says, "Holy fuck. I need a drink," and gets up to refill her glass. Maripier, do not marry this man. This is not a healthy way for that conversation to go. She then tells the camera, "He's just full of himself. I think he has a lot more tests to pass with me for me to say yes to him." Considering how much of her time on this show she has spent wanting him to propose to her as a proof that he's committed to her, I didn't believe this at all.
In the morning, Brandon's family and Maripier's parents converge on them for Christmas morning. They gather around and open presents, which is adorable because there are tiny children. Then Carla, Brandon's sister, says, "We have one more Christmas gift for MP and Uncle B. From Nadine." Brandon says, "Oh, we get Nadine?" Maripier picks up Nadine, the baby, and says, "You're giving her to us? Like, don't have to give birth. Awesome! My vagina's so happy. I'm not gonna have to ruin it." Yeah. Remember the part where she was shocked by what Tiffany said? I don't think Tiffany was the most inappropriate person in this episode. Once Maripier calms down a little bit, Carla says, "We'd like you guys to be godparents of Nadine," which makes Maripier tear up. She asks Brandon, "Is it okay with you?" He says, "I will if you will," and they agree to be Nadine's godparents with hugs all around. Maripier tells the camera, "By Brandon saying, yes, you can do this, that means that he wants to spend his life with me. That's a commitment. That's huge. Brandon could have asked me to marry him and I would not have been as happy as I am right now. It is more significant than any ring. All of a sudden, I'm a part of their family forever." I wanted to keep yelling, "NO!" at her. In a healthy relationship, this would be great, and the way Brandon is so pleased by it and affectionate with her would be great. In this one, not so much. There was too little interaction with Carla and Eric for me to tell if they wanted Maripier to be Nadine's godmother or if they wanted Brandon to be her godfather and included Maripier as his partner. More importantly, the more entangled Maripier gets with Brandon's life, the less likely she is to feel like she has the option break up with him. Again, in a healthy relationship, I wouldn't be concerned about that, but in this case, I think the relationship is unhealthy and Maripier is unhappy, and the option of breaking up should be something she can think about. Brandon getting at least some of the big gestures on Christmas right doesn't make up for how we've seen him treat her in their everyday life.
Brijet and Tiffany
Brijet Whitney and Tiffany Parros spend their time together in this episode. Ray has announced his retirement, and he and George are playing together in an NHL alumni game in Utah, which gives Tiffany and Brijet time to hang out together. They talk a little bit about retirement. Brijet says, "The day that Ray announced, I was glad that I talked to you early, because later on, I kind of fell apart." Tiffany is, for once, not overbearing about the emotional state of someone else. She asks, "You did? Why?" in a tone that makes it clear that she doesn't understand, but she doesn't push back when Brijet talks about her feelings more. We do get her now familiar to the camera comment about how Ray and Brijet don't have to work if they don't want to, unlike George and Tiffany, but for the most part, Tiffany came off as much more gracious and happy in this episode.
During the hockey game, Tiffany says to George, "If you get a hat trick," and gestures at herself and Brijet. To the camera she says, "I mean, obviously we promised him a threesome. But it's like butt sex. You never actually get it. You just promise it." Personally, I rolled my eyes over this, but I bring it up because Maripier tweeted about it: "OMG!! @tparros you did not just say that on national television!! #buttsex" Remember that astonishment at Tiffany's subject choice; it's going to become relevant later.
Martine
Before leaving LA after the party in the last episode, Martine Forget goes to lunch with Jenny Scrivens, Lauren Colella (Jordan Nolan's fiancée), Lauren King, Kelly Williams, and a woman named Veronica Pinto, who the show captions as "Martine's friend." There are really only two interesting things here. First, Veronica does not look like the other women. She isn't as skinny, and she has a round face. I found it interesting that she was the one who was there specifically because she's friends with the model. The other interesting thing is that Martine says she and Jonathan have been engaged for four years. She says there's a lot of pressure to get married, but they just keep pushing the wedding off. "I want to get married, he wants to get married, but if you're in love, like, you don't need to get married because of people, like, talking about it."
Back in Toronto, Martine tells us that she and Jonathan aren't talking much right now because Jonathan gets mad when he loses. Yikes. Then she takes Tyler for a photo shoot for their Christmas cards - without Jonathan because he's so sad. This is not exciting, although it was interesting that Mandi Salmond, Cody Franson's girlfriend, went with her. Martine says about Tyler, "He just, like, knew what he was doing. Maybe he wants to be a model like Mommy."
Noureen
Noureen DeWulf is now in Vancouver. Most of her time in this episode is spent on a photo shoot for with Ryan for Hello! Canada. The best part of this is a bit I can't accurately render in text. Noureen makes two different model faces to indicate her modeling style versus Ryan's modeling style. It's hilarious, but really needs to be seen to get the full effect.
Kodette
Kodette LaBarbera has a meeting with the group from Ryder's therapy team to discuss his progress. This is a meeting with a group of ten women, who are all involved in his program in some way. I thought the phrasing the women used was interesting - these are people who have a lot of training in how to talk to clients about these kinds of things - and I was fascinated by just how many people were involved. We didn't get any kind of introduction to the women, so I'm not sure exactly what role each of them plays in Ryder's therapy.
We next see Kodette bundling the kids into the car to go pick Jason up at the airport. It's Christmas, and he gets to come home for a few days. Easton is very excited to see Jason; Ryder refuses to hug him. "I want to hug you," he tells Kodette.
The family goes skating, which is adorable. Easton is okay, Ryder has never been on skates before. Kodette says, "I guess I'm a little like Easton. I think I'm pretty good out there. But I know that Jason is a little worried about me on skates and thinks I'm going to hurt myself." This is all kinds of adorable, because there are tiny children on skates and because Kodette and Jason both laugh about Kodette's iffy skating abilities. They also have a conversation about how they're getting older. Jason says, "I don't feel thirty-five. I don't feel like the oldest guy on the team." Kodette says, with a laugh, "When did that happen? When did we become the old ones?" No wonder I like Kodette; we're about the same age.
At home, Kodette and Jason talk about Ryder's progress report. Kodette tells Jason that Ryder's therapy team thinks he can attend a typical school next year. "With an aid, though, right?" Jason asks, and Kodette says, "Yeah, and then he can, like, transition fine." Basically, this means they can move to live with Jason next season. Kodette tells the camera, "I can't help but be like, you know, we made the right decision to live apart this year. With Ryder doing so well, it's definitely worth it." The thing I've most liked about Jason and Kodette's relationship on this show is that they were a team in making this decision to live apart, and I like that it feels like they're a team in making the decision to all live together wherever Jason is next year.
Maripier
We spend Christmas with Brandon and Maripier. They drive, with Brandon's sister and nephew, to Quebec City, where both families are spending Christmas together. Maripier really emphasizes that she's excited to have their families together. We only meet Brandon's parents, his sister and her husband and children, and Maripier's parents. According to this interview, Maripier has two brothers. I think they're there in at least the scene of everyone at dinner, but we never meet them, so I wonder if they declined to be featured.
Brandon and Maripier arrive in Quebec City only to face a great crisis: they have no booze, and stores are closing in twenty minutes. They rush out to buy booze and, of course, get stopped by people who recognize Brandon. About the last person, Maripier says, "She tells me in French, 'I don't know who he is. I think my son likes him.' But then she says that she watches my show, so now I like her. So I feel like people are looking at us, and not just at him." This is another example of how she seems to want attention that she doesn't get when Brandon's around. They also buy a lot of booze. I'm a terrible judge of drinking cultures because I don't drink, so I would like to hear other people's thoughts about Maripier and alcohol on this show. From my perspective, she spends an awful lot of the time she's on screen drinking, getting a drink, or talking about getting drunk. I'm not sure if that's part of the lifestyle the show is trying to portray, if she really does drink a lot, or if it doesn't look like a lot to people who drink.
The whole group goes skating. Maripier says of the rink, "Nothing in my memories is more beautiful than this scenery over Christmas." Then she talks about skating: "I left my parents' place when I was twelve years old because I was a figure skater, so to go train, I had to leave and go to Rimouski. I was living in a villa, going to school in the morning, and then training during the afternoon. My goal was to go to the Olympics. And when I was seventeen, I injured my back. I always defined myself as a figure skater, so when I hurt my back, I didn't know what I was good at, but what I realize now is that everything I learned from figure skating, it built who I am." This to me really explains Maripier. I know people can learn social skills at boarding schools, but my guess is that the experience of moving away and into some sort of figure skating program where they may or may not have attended to her social development is why she, as she puts it, has no filter, and probably also why she has no idea what a healthy relationship looks like.
This skating adventure should just be sheer adorableness as they skate around with Chase and Sonia, Brandon's nephew and neice who are old enough to skate, but then Maripier starts talking about how great a dad Brandon will be and says, "My heart just melts when I see Brandon with Sonia and Chase. It makes me realize how amazing of a dad he's gonna be. I think that's when I love him the most, when he's with the kids. I definitely see myself with our kids, skating. I can't wait actually." This is the point where I had to pause the show and go yell on Twitter because just yelling, "Do not have kids with this man!" at the screen wasn't enough. In the comments on last week's post,
jazzish linked to this recent picture Maripier tweeted. Much of their skating adventure, including the parts where Brandon and Maripier hold hands while skating, and especially the gift giving part that comes next, feels like that picture: Maripier is being very physically affectionate and loving to Brandon, and he's doing the bare minimum of not pushing her away and sometimes giving her a kiss.Back in their room/suite/whatever, Brandon asks if Maripier wants her Christmas present now. She gets a drink first, then cuddles up into the tiny space between him and the arm of the couch. He has to get up to get her gift, and he sits down at the opposite end of the couch after he hands her the bag. Inside the bag is a jewelry box - "Brandon gives me a little box, and I have no clue what's in that little box, but a girl can tell pretty quickly when it's not a ring box, and he's not on his knees," Maripier tells the camera - which holds a bracelet Maripier saw over the summer and loved. She didn't tell Brandon about it, so she's amazed he got it for her. This part, where she's amazed and he looks so pleased with getting it right is adorable. Then Maripier puts it on, discovers it's a watch, and starts to cry. She tells the camera, "Fuck, it's a watch. I'm crying because our relationship could be over. When you give a watch to someone, you're putting a time on your relationship," but when Brandon says, "Cry over everything," she tells him, with a clearly upset look on her face, "Happy tears." This is the point at which I lost all hope for Maripier. She's blatantly lying to her partner about her feelings, she's measuring their relationship based on some sort of weird divination of the meaning of gifts that sounds like it comes from the worst kind of women's magazine, and she seems completely sincere about doing both of these things. There isn't even a hint here that maybe some part of her knows there's something wrong with this. Instead of then having a conversation with Brandon about her feelings and what she wants or needs to feel secure in this relationship, she needles him about not proposing to her. She tells him, "It crossed my mind, though. I was like, maybe he's gonna do it, by having both families together." His answer is, "I'm sure it crossed a lot of people's minds," with a look on his face that says he was definitely not one of those people. Maripier then asks him, "Why don't you want to marry me?" He says, with a laugh, as if that's supposed to make it an acceptable way to talk to your partner, "Shut up. I do. I'm just waiting for you to pass all your tests." Maripier says, "Holy fuck. I need a drink," and gets up to refill her glass. Maripier, do not marry this man. This is not a healthy way for that conversation to go. She then tells the camera, "He's just full of himself. I think he has a lot more tests to pass with me for me to say yes to him." Considering how much of her time on this show she has spent wanting him to propose to her as a proof that he's committed to her, I didn't believe this at all.
In the morning, Brandon's family and Maripier's parents converge on them for Christmas morning. They gather around and open presents, which is adorable because there are tiny children. Then Carla, Brandon's sister, says, "We have one more Christmas gift for MP and Uncle B. From Nadine." Brandon says, "Oh, we get Nadine?" Maripier picks up Nadine, the baby, and says, "You're giving her to us? Like, don't have to give birth. Awesome! My vagina's so happy. I'm not gonna have to ruin it." Yeah. Remember the part where she was shocked by what Tiffany said? I don't think Tiffany was the most inappropriate person in this episode. Once Maripier calms down a little bit, Carla says, "We'd like you guys to be godparents of Nadine," which makes Maripier tear up. She asks Brandon, "Is it okay with you?" He says, "I will if you will," and they agree to be Nadine's godparents with hugs all around. Maripier tells the camera, "By Brandon saying, yes, you can do this, that means that he wants to spend his life with me. That's a commitment. That's huge. Brandon could have asked me to marry him and I would not have been as happy as I am right now. It is more significant than any ring. All of a sudden, I'm a part of their family forever." I wanted to keep yelling, "NO!" at her. In a healthy relationship, this would be great, and the way Brandon is so pleased by it and affectionate with her would be great. In this one, not so much. There was too little interaction with Carla and Eric for me to tell if they wanted Maripier to be Nadine's godmother or if they wanted Brandon to be her godfather and included Maripier as his partner. More importantly, the more entangled Maripier gets with Brandon's life, the less likely she is to feel like she has the option break up with him. Again, in a healthy relationship, I wouldn't be concerned about that, but in this case, I think the relationship is unhealthy and Maripier is unhappy, and the option of breaking up should be something she can think about. Brandon getting at least some of the big gestures on Christmas right doesn't make up for how we've seen him treat her in their everyday life.
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-06 05:10 pm (UTC)That watch thing was so wtf, like seriously she thinks Prust would know or care about these kinds of subtle messages in gifts.
As I haven't seen the show I obviously can't make any definite statements and I feel wrong just trying to come up with reasons for Prust's behaviour, because I definitely agree with you that he seems like a jerk, who loves the fame/money way more than he loves Maripier.
But that said, how did he act with his family? Was there a lot of hugging etc? To me some of the way he acts with Maripier could be that he's just not that touchy feely (which seems unlikely as I've seen the gifs of him with his teammates) or that he's really aware of the cameras etc, like I think he must be constantly aware of his public image as a pest/goon type of player and how he doesn't want to seem weak/girly whatever on tv and get chirped for it?
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-06 06:32 pm (UTC)There is definitely some toxic masculinity stuff going on with Brandon. There's a moment in the first episode where they're talking about Guy Lafleur and Maripier says if Brandon broke up with her, she might go for him. Brandon says something about her going for someone younger, and she says, "I would make an exception for him. Even you," and I felt like I could see Brandon see where she was going and decide he wasn't going to let her imply on camera that he might ever be into a man, and he redirects with, "I wouldn't even be mad." But that masculinity stuff doesn't explain all of his awfulness (and I too really wanted there to be an explanation other than that he's an asshole). The absolute worst thing about their relationship is something that came from Maripier in the first episode when she said, "When I ask Brandon a question about hockey, I get a 'mind your own business.'" We didn't see a lot of him with his family, so there isn't a good comparison on the show, although you're right that we've seen him be very affectionate with his teammates. I want him to be better! I just don't have any hope that he is.
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-06 09:05 pm (UTC)I agree with you about how MP attending boarding school influences how she acts now. Without knowing anything about her time there, I’m imagining that maybe her coaches treated her a bit like how Brandon treats her. I know that figure skating is heavily competitive and so typically most coaches are really rough and edgy and do things to push the skater. And I also think they give out praise sparingly. (Like, that time she got into a magazine and Brandon had remarked that it was only two pages. And then she’d said that he was secretly proud of her. That’s like when a coach says ‘you could’ve been perfect.’) But I don’t know, maybe I’m completely wrong.
Also, the part where he talks about all the tests she’s got to pass. That is just so wrong. A partner shouldn't have secret tests that you need to pass. And then where she says that he’s got tests to pass too before she marries him? No. (And they've been together three years or something, right, how are there still more things they don’t know?)
And then the whole godparent thing just made my head spin: On the one hand, I thought for a second, maybe MP’s right because you know, someone wouldn't just pick their brother’s girlfriend to be the godmother unless they thought she really would stick around and they were solid. Then I rationalized that this probably didn't just come out of the woods, no doubt they brought this to Brandon first and asked if he was okay with it.
(Also, when he says: “I will if you will.” What if she’d said no? It’s not like her answer really mattered. That’s his niece, he probably would've said yes anyway.)
But then when MP said that the whole godparent thing implied that he wants to spend his life with her, I realized that no, she is so wrong, and I have no idea if she sees it. Just because you’re a kid’s godparent means nothing, most godparents aren't couples together; they’re just two individual people with no relationship to the other. Plus, the relationship isn't between her and him; it’s with them and the child. And obviously I don’t know how Brandon’s family is, but what happens if Brandon and MP break up? (Didn't they break up last summer?) Is MP going to be able to see this kid if that happens? I highly doubt it, because I kind of think her being godmother is directly related to her being with him.
Then I wondered about what she said: “It is more significant than any ring.” Does she just want a ring? Like a physical token of being together? Or does she want legal documents saying they’re married. If all she wants is a ring why doesn't Brandon just give that to it? It’s just a ring. And if she’s as firm about having babies now and getting married later, I don’t understand why it’s a problem. It’s just the two narratives don’t match up. Either she wants him to propose before having babies (which actually isn't all that solid because just because you say you’ll get married doesn't mean you actually will) or she wants to get married now.
(And to go further, obviously the producers of this show had a hand in creating this plot, but seriously, did MP not think that all this marriage pestering wasn't going to lead people into thinking that she’s insecure? I just don’t see how a women who is promoted as being an “it-girl” with all her jobs and being branded as uber confident can’t see that all is just tarnishing people’s view of her and making her seem sad. Like, before I thought she was beautiful and independent but now I’m just like, why is she so pushy and why doesn't she just leave? She could easily find a man who listens to her, and cherishes her. But like you said before, maybe she’s slightly dependent on him to help her career.)
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-07 01:21 am (UTC)Oooh, interesting point about Brandon treating her the way figure skating coaches would. I hadn't thought about that at all. She might find it familiar if it's the same kind of thing. Although that makes it disturbing in another sense - coach-athlete is a dynamic with a huge power differential that you really don't want to replicate in a healthy partnership/marriage. Maripier seems like she learned about relationships from romantic comedies and bad women's magazines, which made more sense to me when I found out she lived away from home (and not, it sounds like, with billets like hockey players do which at least gives you some other exposure to adult relationships) for her teenage years.
Tests: SO WRONG. They've been together for five years (although I saw some discussion on Twitter about how he was publicly dating someone else three years ago or so, so maybe it's been off and on) and living together for at least two assuming they moved in together when he came to Montreal, which does seem like enough time to know most of what they need to know. And if there are other things they need to know before making that kind of commitment, that is a thing they should talk about, not play mind games around.
The godparent thing: I think you really hit on all the reasons why it doesn't seem to symbolize what she thinks it does. In a previous episode she tells Tiffany that she would be happy if Brandon proposed because it would mean he wanted to commit to her. I expect that's the piece she wants out of a proposal. This is where I think Tiffany's comment from the last episode that the fights don't go away just because you're married is really good advice. Maripier seems insecure in her relationship - both in the things she's said about being jealous and in her obsession with Brandon making some kind of commitment to their life together - but I don't think a proposal would actually fix that. I mean, they already have an apartment, a dog, and a restaurant together, and that's not making her feel secure. And she herself said in an interview, "If you want to cheat, whether you're a hockey player or a teacher, you're going to cheat." If Brandon wants to cheat on her or leave her, a wedding ring isn't going to stop him. Her trust, jealousy, and insecurity issues aren't going to go away if they get married.
You have such a good point about the framing! Maripier said in an interview after the first two eps aired, "I kind of got mad at them. I was like, 'You can't make me look like something that I'm not.' I'm not looking to get married next year or in two years or in three years." But it's not like they're making this whole thing up; she and Brandon are having these conversations, and she is saying these things to the camera. If she didn't want this to be part of how she's portrayed, she should have had different conversations in front of the cameras - it's not like she doesn't know they're there. I think she maybe doesn't see how awful her relationship looks from the outside (and of course she's getting something out of it, and sometimes it's good). Really, watching her and Brandon feels so much like a Captain Awkward letter. I keep hoping the outside perspective of the show is either going to make her see it differently or make other people she might listen to when they express their concerns see it differently.
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-07 08:14 am (UTC)the watch thing was ridiculous. she has the maturity of a 16-year-old (and yes, her going to boarding school explained a lot). i don't know, maybe it's a québecois superstition and not something she read in some magazine, but that is still the dumbest thing to get upset about. and she clearly still hadn't changed her mind when she was doing the voiceover, or she'd have said she was being silly, she knows it's a dumb superstition or something, but she didn't.
i was thinking about this post (http://apenelopiad.tumblr.com/post/117690545399/quebec-marriage-or-not-customs-and-name-changing) i saw on tumblr, about québecers and their attitude towards marriage, which basically says that marriage isn't all that important to them. i feel like you see that in what maripier said about having kids first and getting married eventually, but not in the near future. and then there's the pressure from the outside (the other wives, hockey culture, the show), pushing her to ask him if he wants to marry her, if he's going to propose, if he's serious about her, etc. it's like she's being pulled in two directions and she needs to make up her mind about what she wants and stop caring so much about what others think (which is easier said than done).
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-07 06:08 pm (UTC)Yep, that's exactly the kind of thing that her living away from her parents explains to me. And it was so ridiculous!
Ooh, interesting! That is definitely something you see in what she's said about not wanting to get married anytime soon, but not at all how she's behaving on the show. You can also see that in how Martine talks about marriage and not feeling like she needs to get married just because people are always talking about it. (Martine on marriage and Maripier on commitment in this episode were such a stark contrast.)
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-07 06:22 pm (UTC)The way their relationship is, where he needles and insults her is actually kind of familiar to me in some couples I have in my social circle. I don't know why, but it seems to be accepted... With some of the couples it is mutual, that they insult each other equally, but I still don't see why that's a good way to run your relationship, especially because it does go over the line pretty often and one or both get their feelings hurt. These are all "normal" non athletic backgrounds having people, so I guess it's just a thing that happens sometimes. (random thing that came to mind)
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-07 07:02 pm (UTC)Part of what I find disturbing about this show is that I suspect the disturbing things aren't as much an aspect of hockey culture as they are an aspect of the wider culture, and the state of opposite-sex relationships doesn't look that great. I think that on the show, Dustin and Nicole Brown are a contrast to this - they do mutually chirp each other, but neither of them seems unhappy about it, which is completely different from this where Maripier seems really unhappy.
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-08 02:19 am (UTC)I also think of how earlier in the show, one of the wives (Tiffany?) mentioned that there's a big difference in how the girlfriends are treated compared to the wives, and it makes me wonder if maybe Maripier is felling pressured by that on top of the cultural differences in how marriage is pushed on people outside of Québec.
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-08 06:00 pm (UTC)Good point about the treatment of girlfriends versus wives! Even in Montreal, most of the players and their partners aren't French-Canadian, and probably don't have that French-Canadian perspective on marriage, so I can see Maripier feeling more pressure from them as well. I would guess that's exacerbated by Brandon being from Ontario, in contrast to Martine and Jonathan where they're both from Québec.
(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-14 12:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2015-05-14 06:25 pm (UTC)