Ruth Sadelle Alderson

I'm thinking that I don't really want to rebel against fandom. I'm a person of colour, female, and also not American, so a lot of your posts about fandom, sexuality, race and other related aspects sometimes make me feel inadequate, as if there's something I need to know and I just don't get it. It happens a lot with other people's posts too, and it makes me dislike fandom sometimes for trying so hard at everything, or being trying to be fair to everyone, when my experience patently and emphatically explains that in real life once I leave my own country, and even when I'm in it, I have to go against a lot of walls every day, and it's tiring. I don't like things that make me think too hard in fandom, when I get daily arguments about the same things in meatspace, but I figure that's the point of the whole thing. Which is why I read the posts, because I learn a lot and try to change.

I personally have never thought of writing the stories I say I want to read. I've actually never thought of what I want to read in fandom. It's....it probably seems super simplistic and naive to you, for the rabbit hole simply doesn't go down that deep for me. When it comes to writing original stuff though, I find I go a little farther. I tend to prefer writing f/f in original stuff, surprisingly, and I guess I think about it more...and not because I want to be a published writer, because I'm thinking that I really don't want to be. But it means more to me in that way to include POC in original stuff.

*thinks*