(you just might get it)
Feb. 11th, 2008 08:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rsadelleA couple of Fridays ago, I read an article on the Yoga Journal website about surrendering to the will of the universe. She talks about trying to write a yoga article and finally said to the universe or whatever's out there, "If you want this to happen, you'll have to do it, because I can't," and then she could do it.
So I thought, okay. When i was doing yoga that day, I thought out to the universe, "If you want me to be a writer, you have to help me."
Less than twenty-four hours later, someone messaged me on Facebook because she's starting a local writing critique group. I thought I'd damn well better do it. I went to the meet-n-greet that Sunday, and sent in a piece for the meeting the next week.
Because I'd thought about putting it out there, I thought I'd get a head start on my February nonfiction reading and check out Po Bronson's What Should I Do With My Life? After I got the invite to join the writing group, I thought I would just dive into it without waiting for a new month. That Tuesday, on the plane, I got to Joe Olchefske's story. He asks, "Where is my generation?" Po says, "Waiting for the pain that opens up its heart." He earlier said, "Joe Olchefske cracked open." I not only thought, but wrote in my one-sentence journal, "I don't want to wait for pain to crack my heart open. I want my heart to be opened without the pain."
On Wednesday, one hour of our meeting was devoted to "stage presence/improv" with an acting teacher. She had us drop our jaws, breathe all the way down into our bellies, and look each other in the eye. She told us to open our hearts. She told us to lead from the heart. I've spent a lot of years not crying in public, so I didn't. I teared up, and when we broke for lunch, I had to take a break from the group and meditate by the fountain.
Asking is powerful. I forget because I don't ask for things that often, and I never ask the universe or God or whatever for them. I've said before that I think of prayer as meditation not supplication. I've always thought there was something not quite right about asking God for things. I've been thinking of what Marianne Williamson says, that "our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." Who am I, I wonder, to ask God for anything? Even now that I've asked and been answered, I can't attrribute it to God. It's the universe, I keep thinking that's answered me.
So I thought, okay. When i was doing yoga that day, I thought out to the universe, "If you want me to be a writer, you have to help me."
Less than twenty-four hours later, someone messaged me on Facebook because she's starting a local writing critique group. I thought I'd damn well better do it. I went to the meet-n-greet that Sunday, and sent in a piece for the meeting the next week.
Because I'd thought about putting it out there, I thought I'd get a head start on my February nonfiction reading and check out Po Bronson's What Should I Do With My Life? After I got the invite to join the writing group, I thought I would just dive into it without waiting for a new month. That Tuesday, on the plane, I got to Joe Olchefske's story. He asks, "Where is my generation?" Po says, "Waiting for the pain that opens up its heart." He earlier said, "Joe Olchefske cracked open." I not only thought, but wrote in my one-sentence journal, "I don't want to wait for pain to crack my heart open. I want my heart to be opened without the pain."
On Wednesday, one hour of our meeting was devoted to "stage presence/improv" with an acting teacher. She had us drop our jaws, breathe all the way down into our bellies, and look each other in the eye. She told us to open our hearts. She told us to lead from the heart. I've spent a lot of years not crying in public, so I didn't. I teared up, and when we broke for lunch, I had to take a break from the group and meditate by the fountain.
Asking is powerful. I forget because I don't ask for things that often, and I never ask the universe or God or whatever for them. I've said before that I think of prayer as meditation not supplication. I've always thought there was something not quite right about asking God for things. I've been thinking of what Marianne Williamson says, that "our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." Who am I, I wonder, to ask God for anything? Even now that I've asked and been answered, I can't attrribute it to God. It's the universe, I keep thinking that's answered me.